End of hectic week.. Phew!~

Alhamdulillah, selesai mesy jk kabinet harini. Last two days, FTA negotiations. Letih. Letih menjalankan kerja-kerja tersebut, dan letih nak prepare. Letih stress dan kelam kabut. Dan finally, they're in the past now.

Semalam, lepas nego, bawak Sarah jumpa paed. She'd been having fever since Saturday. Since tak kebah-kebah, bawak la jumpa paed dia. Rupanya tonsil dia inflammed. So kena la makan antibiotik. InsyaAllah, hope she'll be fine in a day or two.

Semalam jugak, i managed to squeeze in my gynae appointment. My third pregnancy aptmt at 11+ weeks. Alhamdulillah, semuanya ok. Dr did a scan. At first the baby just sat still. So i said to the Doc, "Kenapa senyap je baby ni, last time beriya2 gerak.." As soon as i said that dia pun melompat-lompat. Hehe. *Happy* Sarah pun excited tengok scanned image of adik dia. Of course, we don't know if it's a girl or a boy yet.

Esok, nak balik rumah mama. Going to stay away from KL as much as i can this weekend. Penangan Bersih yang menyusahkan orang. It's sad to see how people can get so stupid. :p

Whateverlah. Nak gi solat.. and out for dinner. Penatnyaa.. Sigh!~ Takpelah.. all for a good cause.

The dark clouds are looming...

*Long sigh*

The work place is the best place to proof to you that life really is like huge spinning wheel. One day you're on top, another day, you're down under. I had my 'up' days for a while, now, i can feel myself going rock bottom.. Ok.. maybe i'm exaggerating, but seriously, i'm not happy.

My boss, lets call him DMT, is current away on a month-long course. As our division is the dasar division (yes, it can either be read as policy or rock bottom.. your choice.. :p ) the Sec Gen feels that there's a need for someone to head the div while DMT is away.

DMT is certainly not in my sec-gen's good books. Somehow, he managed to get to where he is right now. I've only been working for him for less than a month before he had to leave for the course, but i've heard about him from other colleagues. Not a lot of positive remarks, but based on my own experience for that short span of period, i think he's ok. He doesn't really disturb me on weekends and doesn't expect to stay in the office til the wee hours.. that's good enough for me. What he lacks i think is giving proper directions to his officers, and being the head of the policy division (or which ever division for that matter).. the ability to give an aim to your subordinates is crucial.

Anyways, one of my Sec-Gen's trusted people to head the division whilst DMT is gone is no other than my previous boss, who had given me a lot of stresses and rock bottom times, DS. Although she's not physically there in our division, it's really getting to me already. I just can't stand it. I think i've exhausted all my patience and sanity to bear with her. If i have to do it all over again, i'm gonna lose it. Seriously. In what way, i don't know, but what i'm certain of is that i'm not gonna be able to bear with her, ever.

Given the level of trustworthiness that the Sec Gen has upon her, we've heard rumors that her placement is gonna be permanent, instead of just for the period that DMT is away. Probably it's not gonna be right after DMT comes back, since the Ministry can't really swap their places because of some technical issues, but i could foresee it coming later in the year. I do hope that she heads the other operational division instead of doing policy, but, i have a hunch that the more possible placement for her is the policy division. And if that happens, i'm really gonna make my way out. Not just the division, the Ministry!

I have to bear until January though. Then i'll have a 3 months maternity leave, and i intend to prolong the leave to a year. Hopefully, after that i'll be in the pool for a while and i hope that i wouldn't be placed under that freaking Ministry again!

I'm just so traumatized by my previous experience. I guess the experience had hit me harder than i thought it did. And i just can't go through it again..

Please Ya Allah, let there be light..