6 days and counting
Yep..just less than a week's time, and DPA will be over. It'll be a hectic week ahead, as it had been last week. At least last week during classes sempat jugak la nap.. no, i really don't mean in between classes, i mean during class itself. Hakhak.. masa dah pregnant ni cam senang je nak tdo dlm kelas. Cam azno masa kuliah dolu2..heheheee.... :D
Last night we had this dance competition, but our sidang only got third place. Kitorang danced to 2 songs, one hindi and one malay.. since the theme is muhibah. I danced the malay one la since it has less vigorous moves. All my friends cakap.. sah2 babay nih terer menari la esok2.. haha... Ok la.. warisi bakat mummy.. Tp jgn gi clubbing je plak sudah la... Pastu tadik, jumpa ppk.. dia pun tegur "dah mengandung pun nak menari jugak.." hehe.. nak wat cane.. kang tak join tak cukup dancer nak wakil sidang. Belasah je la.
In the afternoon, sesambil nengok kengkawan main galah panjang sempena karnival sukan rakyat kinda-thing, lepak ngn another ppk.. dia ckpla, during the first 3 mths ni kena jaga elok2... cite experience dia, bila wife dia tau je pregnant, dia tak bagi dah sapu umah ke, drive ke, basuh kain ke.. Semua dia yang buat. He said wife dia senang gugur... so mmg dielak buat keje2 ringan atau berat in the first 3 months. Rasa cam gabra gak bila dia citer, since teringat balik macam2 benda ganas yang dah dibuat... menari la, brisk walking la... tapi so far, alhamdulillah, selamat lagik kot. Bleeding ke takdela.. Morning sickness pun dah macam start. So, insyaAllah, oke kot. Tapi still amek iktibar gakla. Hubby pun pesan, not to over exert myself and get as much rest as possible... heehe. tu yang tdo during class tu. ;)
Pregnancy update
Bouts of morning sickness has started...but it also occurs and night.
Tapi takla muntah banyak2 kali sangat.. Ada la sekali dua in a day... Skang suka makan yang pedas2, takleh tolerate makanan main dish yang macam manis sikit..Kira kalau sambal tu kena kaw2 punya pedas la.. (nak kena balik umah nenek nih). Bawang yang hiris2 yang masih visible dlm food pun takleh terima.. Loya je rasa tekak.. sbb cawang tu cam manis2 kan... Dulu bawang antara benda yang disukai.. Isk.. Skang terbayang bawang je pun tekak boleh kembang. Pastu macam selalu teringin nak makan aiskrim, cakes... tapi tak makan pun... beli, tapi tak makan. Heheh.
P/s: aznooooo... aku teringat kek black forest ipoh laaaaa...... nyum nyum...
Alreity..that's abt it for now. Tdo plak la.. esok kena gi pagi gak. Ciao!
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Monday, June 19, 2006
Excitement in worry
I've been keeping this to myself for the past one week. At first, i didn't wanna tell anyone just yet, but i just can't keep it to myself. I need to let it out. I'm 6 weeks pregnant!!!!! Despite all my rantings in the previous post, i'm actually rather excited about the pregnancy. Hmm.. :) Imagining myself with a bump. No wonderla i felt so haywired the previous weeks.. emotional rollercoaster akibat buatan suami rupanya..Hehehe... :)
Anyways... two weeks back, as in the previous post, my period was late. At 5 days delay, i did a self test and it returned negative, much to my relieve (at that time). Told hubby, and he said ok but he felt kinda dissappointed in a way. When hubby said that, i kinda feel bad about it, but went about life as usual.
On the weekend, we went to my family gathering in PD and had loads of fun, and i engaged in a number of activities namely getting thrown into the water from the banana boat thingy (5 times), main terompah gergasi sampai jatuh2 terduduk, lari2 kat pantai, tarik tali dengan bersungguh2... stuffs like that. Hehe. Completely forgotten about my delayed period whatsoever.
Sunday, we got back to KL. Monday, class as usual. Monday night, period was still absent. That was a call for another self test. So it went.. pee - test - wait... A minute later... hmm.. still a single line.. and i took a closer look... Hmm.. i think i saw another faint line at the test area.. Hmm.. showed it to my hubby to confirm... he thought he saw it too.. and we were in confusion the whole night.
Tuesday, went to class, still anxious about last night's test result. During lunch break, i followed a friend to a pharmacy to get another kit and tested as soon as i reach my friend's room. The result returned a definite 2 lines!! I am pregnant!!! :)
As excited as I am, i can't help but to worry about the fetus. Last week both my hubby and i went to the gynae and she perfomed the ultrasound on me. She said i was 6 weeks pregnant, counting from the 1st day of the last period. The ultrasound showed us a tiny oval-shaped spot inside my uterus which the dr said was the baby! I was like so excited to see it. My very own baby. :) It was just abot 4mm long, but the worrying part was that the dr couldn't detect the heartbeat. She told me it was probably too early to find a heartbeat and asked me to come again in 2 weeks time. She said if in 2 weeks we still couldn't hear the heartbeat, there could be a problem with the pregnancy... which is really, really worrying me right now.
Read through some forums in the net about a fetus' heartbeat, it is said that usually it can only be heard after 8 weeks, and it's trickier to ind a heartbeat when the mother has tilted/retroverted uterus, a condition which i'm in (according to my previous obgyn). Dunnola... i'm just so worried. With this aching back i have right now, i'm even more worried since my mom and dan's granma said that backaches in the early pregnancy is not a good sign. Hmm... it'd been giving me bad dreams every night. Sigh!~
Ntahla... fikir salah, tak fikir pun salah. Whatever it is, i believe that whatever is happening is God's will, and only the Almighty knows what's best for his servants.
Kita cuma mampu berdoa diberi kekuatan atas segala ketentuanNya.
I've been keeping this to myself for the past one week. At first, i didn't wanna tell anyone just yet, but i just can't keep it to myself. I need to let it out. I'm 6 weeks pregnant!!!!! Despite all my rantings in the previous post, i'm actually rather excited about the pregnancy. Hmm.. :) Imagining myself with a bump. No wonderla i felt so haywired the previous weeks.. emotional rollercoaster akibat buatan suami rupanya..Hehehe... :)
Anyways... two weeks back, as in the previous post, my period was late. At 5 days delay, i did a self test and it returned negative, much to my relieve (at that time). Told hubby, and he said ok but he felt kinda dissappointed in a way. When hubby said that, i kinda feel bad about it, but went about life as usual.
On the weekend, we went to my family gathering in PD and had loads of fun, and i engaged in a number of activities namely getting thrown into the water from the banana boat thingy (5 times), main terompah gergasi sampai jatuh2 terduduk, lari2 kat pantai, tarik tali dengan bersungguh2... stuffs like that. Hehe. Completely forgotten about my delayed period whatsoever.
Sunday, we got back to KL. Monday, class as usual. Monday night, period was still absent. That was a call for another self test. So it went.. pee - test - wait... A minute later... hmm.. still a single line.. and i took a closer look... Hmm.. i think i saw another faint line at the test area.. Hmm.. showed it to my hubby to confirm... he thought he saw it too.. and we were in confusion the whole night.
Tuesday, went to class, still anxious about last night's test result. During lunch break, i followed a friend to a pharmacy to get another kit and tested as soon as i reach my friend's room. The result returned a definite 2 lines!! I am pregnant!!! :)
As excited as I am, i can't help but to worry about the fetus. Last week both my hubby and i went to the gynae and she perfomed the ultrasound on me. She said i was 6 weeks pregnant, counting from the 1st day of the last period. The ultrasound showed us a tiny oval-shaped spot inside my uterus which the dr said was the baby! I was like so excited to see it. My very own baby. :) It was just abot 4mm long, but the worrying part was that the dr couldn't detect the heartbeat. She told me it was probably too early to find a heartbeat and asked me to come again in 2 weeks time. She said if in 2 weeks we still couldn't hear the heartbeat, there could be a problem with the pregnancy... which is really, really worrying me right now.
Read through some forums in the net about a fetus' heartbeat, it is said that usually it can only be heard after 8 weeks, and it's trickier to ind a heartbeat when the mother has tilted/retroverted uterus, a condition which i'm in (according to my previous obgyn). Dunnola... i'm just so worried. With this aching back i have right now, i'm even more worried since my mom and dan's granma said that backaches in the early pregnancy is not a good sign. Hmm... it'd been giving me bad dreams every night. Sigh!~
Ntahla... fikir salah, tak fikir pun salah. Whatever it is, i believe that whatever is happening is God's will, and only the Almighty knows what's best for his servants.
Kita cuma mampu berdoa diberi kekuatan atas segala ketentuanNya.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Stabilized
Thank God, my moods are almost stabilized now. Not worrying so much about pregnancy or anything else. One of the reasons, DPA is gonna end in about 2 weeks. But mind you, it'll be a loonnggg 2 weeks. :p
Stabilized as i was, i was pretty pissed with this idiotic person who thinks he has absolute power. I wish he could just get a life. Had to see him for sth, but it seems that he just can't be polite at the very least. The hell with him la. You don't get respect without earning it. It's quite useless to preach to people about manners and politeness when you don't even have a trace of any of those qualities yourself. What a damned pig. :p A higher rank doesn't mean you can treat people like dirt. What goes around comes around.. might not happen to you.. but hey.. you have kids, and they might get shit form others. The same farking shit that you gave people. Whatever... no use saying anything to someone who thinks he's farking great. It'll only fall on deaf ears. Eughhh.. why am i even wasting my time and blog space to describe this person? So not worth it.
Thank you friends
Thanks a lot girls for all the support. Really, really appreciate it. It's kinda sad not having really close girlfriend to talk to and share girly things. It's different than talking to hubby or colleagues. Girlfriends listens and support you... well hubby do too, but they do it in a different way. They tend to give you solutions, when you're not even trying to find one. Sometimes when we say stuffs, it's just to let off the steam, not trying to find a solution. Hmmm...
Alreity.. nothing else to share at the moment.. :) Hmm.. my blog needs a major facelift.. Like really. :p
Thank God, my moods are almost stabilized now. Not worrying so much about pregnancy or anything else. One of the reasons, DPA is gonna end in about 2 weeks. But mind you, it'll be a loonnggg 2 weeks. :p
Stabilized as i was, i was pretty pissed with this idiotic person who thinks he has absolute power. I wish he could just get a life. Had to see him for sth, but it seems that he just can't be polite at the very least. The hell with him la. You don't get respect without earning it. It's quite useless to preach to people about manners and politeness when you don't even have a trace of any of those qualities yourself. What a damned pig. :p A higher rank doesn't mean you can treat people like dirt. What goes around comes around.. might not happen to you.. but hey.. you have kids, and they might get shit form others. The same farking shit that you gave people. Whatever... no use saying anything to someone who thinks he's farking great. It'll only fall on deaf ears. Eughhh.. why am i even wasting my time and blog space to describe this person? So not worth it.
Thank you friends
Thanks a lot girls for all the support. Really, really appreciate it. It's kinda sad not having really close girlfriend to talk to and share girly things. It's different than talking to hubby or colleagues. Girlfriends listens and support you... well hubby do too, but they do it in a different way. They tend to give you solutions, when you're not even trying to find one. Sometimes when we say stuffs, it's just to let off the steam, not trying to find a solution. Hmmm...
Alreity.. nothing else to share at the moment.. :) Hmm.. my blog needs a major facelift.. Like really. :p
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
Baby Talk
I’m now six month married, going into my seventh now. I think for couples who’d been married half a year, they’d want to plan on having a baby in the family. Does it make me a weirdo if I said that I’m not ready for baby yet? I dunno. I think I’m not ready; emotionally, mentally… and my gynae said physically too.. coz he said that I oughtta shed some pounds to ensure a safe pregnancy.
That aside, I’ve just recently discovered how freaked out I was about the idea of having a baby. When my period was late, I went beserk. I had so many things in my mind; fear, worries… none of it excitement. I felt giddy with all the worrying. I broke down… and that’s only when I assumed that I was pregnant.. I wasn’t actually pregnant yet.
I mean.. it’s not that I don’t want a baby at all… I do… but not just yet. I worry that I won’t be able to care for the baby, given the condition that I’m in now, with the DPA and all, I’m barely at home. The house is in a mess, I’m in a mess. I can’t even take care of myself.. needless to mention a baby. So far, I can only tolerate kids to a certain point.. and that’s just spending a few hours with them. If I was having my PMS, I’ll lose it. It happened before, with Athirah. It’s fun to spend some time with them, but I don’t know if I’m capable of handling a human child 24-7. A baby needs constant attention. You need to feed them, change their diapers, burp them… the list goes on and on… I don’t think I’m capable of that yet. I mean… I can’t even care for a pathetic cactus plant for God’s sake… and now a human baby? And this baby doesn’t stay being a baby the whole time. Babies grow up. They have a future ahead of them… If I fuck up in bringing up my baby… I’m fucking up his/her future. Another human being’s future…. Imagine that.
I dunno. Maybe I’m just thinking too much. It’s either the thinking that made me freaked out or the other way round. Whatever it is, as I sat down just now,reading a book on prophets, I came to a realization that babies are gifts from God. Hubby had been telling me that when I broke down but it just wouldn’t sink in. When the time comes for us to be ready to care for a baby, He will send us that gift. Sesungguhnya Allah jua yang maha mengetahui. I just have to keep reminding myself that when I get freaked out again. :)
I’m now six month married, going into my seventh now. I think for couples who’d been married half a year, they’d want to plan on having a baby in the family. Does it make me a weirdo if I said that I’m not ready for baby yet? I dunno. I think I’m not ready; emotionally, mentally… and my gynae said physically too.. coz he said that I oughtta shed some pounds to ensure a safe pregnancy.
That aside, I’ve just recently discovered how freaked out I was about the idea of having a baby. When my period was late, I went beserk. I had so many things in my mind; fear, worries… none of it excitement. I felt giddy with all the worrying. I broke down… and that’s only when I assumed that I was pregnant.. I wasn’t actually pregnant yet.
I mean.. it’s not that I don’t want a baby at all… I do… but not just yet. I worry that I won’t be able to care for the baby, given the condition that I’m in now, with the DPA and all, I’m barely at home. The house is in a mess, I’m in a mess. I can’t even take care of myself.. needless to mention a baby. So far, I can only tolerate kids to a certain point.. and that’s just spending a few hours with them. If I was having my PMS, I’ll lose it. It happened before, with Athirah. It’s fun to spend some time with them, but I don’t know if I’m capable of handling a human child 24-7. A baby needs constant attention. You need to feed them, change their diapers, burp them… the list goes on and on… I don’t think I’m capable of that yet. I mean… I can’t even care for a pathetic cactus plant for God’s sake… and now a human baby? And this baby doesn’t stay being a baby the whole time. Babies grow up. They have a future ahead of them… If I fuck up in bringing up my baby… I’m fucking up his/her future. Another human being’s future…. Imagine that.
I dunno. Maybe I’m just thinking too much. It’s either the thinking that made me freaked out or the other way round. Whatever it is, as I sat down just now,reading a book on prophets, I came to a realization that babies are gifts from God. Hubby had been telling me that when I broke down but it just wouldn’t sink in. When the time comes for us to be ready to care for a baby, He will send us that gift. Sesungguhnya Allah jua yang maha mengetahui. I just have to keep reminding myself that when I get freaked out again. :)
This is a backdated entry for last weekend.
Perfect Weekend
After quite a shit-filled week, my weekend had been perfect. Thanks to my dearest, understanding and loving hubby that made it perfect. We managed to spend the weekend together, since he wasn’t flying, went to his bi-annual family gathering, watched a movie together and had tremendous fun…. Hehe.. rabbits. ;)
Too bad there’s only 2 days in a weekend. :p
Shitty week
Yep.. that’s how I’d describe the last week. Pretty damn shitty. Taught me one valuable lesson (which had actually been told by Ustaz dulu).. you can never ever trust anybody in this whole wide world except 3 people. I was so gullible to think that people would be truthful and keep to their words as I would.
It started last Sunday when I was on the way to KL from Sepang via Sg Besi Highway. Just before the the Sg Besi toll plaza, a jackass in a Storm bumped into the back of my car. Of course, I didn’t know that he’s a jackass at that time. I got out, rather shocked since it was my first accident with another party (before this my accidents were like me-only and didn’t involve anybody else) and he said we’d better settle the thingy off-court since it was minor and to claim from the insurance would just take forever. He agreed to give me some cash (which I won’t state here coz you’ll laugh your guts out if I did) and I took it along with his sugar coated words to end it there. I said I’ll take the money, but if it costs me more than what he gave me, I’ll ring him up and send him the bill ( I made him give me his card).
So the day eventually came for us (my hubby) to send the car for repairs. As it turned up, it cost like 10 times more than what he gave me, coz there were hidden wreckage that I didn’t notice at the time of accident. When my hubby called him, the bastard said that I didn’t want to report.. padahal it was a mutual decision. Celaka je. He didn’t want to pay up and told my hubby if we want more money, we should lodge a police report. He said he lodged one already. Sial kan? Cakap tak serupa bikin. Memang dasar bangsa tu. Fine. The asshole wants to give us shit, we’ll give him shit.
The following night, we lodged a police report. As the officer was sympathetic to how gullible I had been, he helped us out with the report. So there, we lodged a report. When the officer crosschecked if the asshole lodged a report abt the accident, it turned up that he didn’t. Fucking idiot. Anyways… he’s gonna get it. He’ll get a fine for bumping into me, he’ll get another one for not lodging a report, and we get to claim from his insurance. I hope you like what you get you dumb fuck.
Perfect Weekend
After quite a shit-filled week, my weekend had been perfect. Thanks to my dearest, understanding and loving hubby that made it perfect. We managed to spend the weekend together, since he wasn’t flying, went to his bi-annual family gathering, watched a movie together and had tremendous fun…. Hehe.. rabbits. ;)
Too bad there’s only 2 days in a weekend. :p
Shitty week
Yep.. that’s how I’d describe the last week. Pretty damn shitty. Taught me one valuable lesson (which had actually been told by Ustaz dulu).. you can never ever trust anybody in this whole wide world except 3 people. I was so gullible to think that people would be truthful and keep to their words as I would.
It started last Sunday when I was on the way to KL from Sepang via Sg Besi Highway. Just before the the Sg Besi toll plaza, a jackass in a Storm bumped into the back of my car. Of course, I didn’t know that he’s a jackass at that time. I got out, rather shocked since it was my first accident with another party (before this my accidents were like me-only and didn’t involve anybody else) and he said we’d better settle the thingy off-court since it was minor and to claim from the insurance would just take forever. He agreed to give me some cash (which I won’t state here coz you’ll laugh your guts out if I did) and I took it along with his sugar coated words to end it there. I said I’ll take the money, but if it costs me more than what he gave me, I’ll ring him up and send him the bill ( I made him give me his card).
So the day eventually came for us (my hubby) to send the car for repairs. As it turned up, it cost like 10 times more than what he gave me, coz there were hidden wreckage that I didn’t notice at the time of accident. When my hubby called him, the bastard said that I didn’t want to report.. padahal it was a mutual decision. Celaka je. He didn’t want to pay up and told my hubby if we want more money, we should lodge a police report. He said he lodged one already. Sial kan? Cakap tak serupa bikin. Memang dasar bangsa tu. Fine. The asshole wants to give us shit, we’ll give him shit.
The following night, we lodged a police report. As the officer was sympathetic to how gullible I had been, he helped us out with the report. So there, we lodged a report. When the officer crosschecked if the asshole lodged a report abt the accident, it turned up that he didn’t. Fucking idiot. Anyways… he’s gonna get it. He’ll get a fine for bumping into me, he’ll get another one for not lodging a report, and we get to claim from his insurance. I hope you like what you get you dumb fuck.
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