Erkk.. i'm back in p.buntar already?? Oh darn it! Why am i here??? Why cant i still be in KL having great, relaxing days at home with my mom and Athirah??? Why??? Duh... stop asking the obvious missy! You wouldnt be here if you'd completed your postgrad's research already would you?? Duh!!! ;(( Ok... only a few months lefts... that's all it takes... (i hope!)

Holidays had always been great, even if you dont really get to go anywhere or do anything other than lazily planting your bum in the comforting cushions of the settee, switching channels frantically like there's no tomorrow and yawning ever so broadly that it looks like you may somewhat tear your mouth apart.... yep... the bliss of a holiday. Well of course it'd be better to have a holiday some place else than home... somewhere you can totally relax and let everyone else do everthing for you.. to let yourself be pampered... ayee... that'd be nice... but since that doesnt come quite so easily, i'm thankful enough that i'm entitled to get a few days off work... unlike my hunny bun who's leaves had to be cut short (still angry with transmile for ruining things).

Thursday
Had a smashing good time with Dan. Spent the whole day with him. Went to KLCC looking for a pda coz he wants one so much... then he bought me 2 shirts, one blue and one pink; since he said i looked elegant in the blue one and yummy in the pink one.. so he suggested that i took both.. and i did! :D Thanks sayang! Had lunch cum dinner at Chilli's. Ummmm... can still feel that thick, savoury, cheesy gravy on the heavenly tasty mashed potato melting in my mouth.... yummmm.... sedapnya!!!! Sangat sedap! Sedap times infinity lah. (eeps... controlll.. batal puasa kang. :p)

Friday
Spent Deepavali at my aunt's in Pandan coz she was having this kenduri menjelang ramadhan kinda thingy... and later that evening, went to Dan's parents', also somewhere in Pandan. Spent like an hour there chit chatting with his parents.
"Dan kata kat aunty not to buy you shiny materials... he said he didnt like it on you."
":)" (actually kan aunty... i kinda asked Dan to ask you not to buy me shiny materials... tapi camne bleh terpakai shiny garment lak that day..)
"Abg Jib dulu next month dia nak kawin, this month baru ckp. I told Dan not to do that to me."
"Hmm.. yeah lah aunty... too short a time of getting things prepared right?"
"Dan monday ni baru balik from Manila, aunty."
"Oh... Hmm... Noreen kena la belajar about all this things.. Dia kan cukup tak suka if....."
"Yeah.. i know... hehehe..."
"Bila Noreen nak habis belajar?"
"Dunno yet aunty... research depends on me.. kalau i cepat buat, then i'll finish early."

Ahahaahahaa... again... i did it alone~! While Dan was away... isk... ok apa? ;)

Saturday
Spent half the day at home and another half the day shopping with my mom, mak ngah and zura. Went to DMI's (dr mashitah ibrahim) boutique at The Mall... too bad that they didnt offer a huge variety of scarfs... the were moderate numbers of jubah designs la (prices are rm100 and above for jubah and rm35 and above for scarfs--or sth around that la). So... since my mom and mak ngah wanted to find tudung so much, we went to Jln TAR instead... sampai la senja.

Sunday
Went to Jln TAR again with my mom in te morning to get her tudung and my kain for nura's wedding. Later i went to MV with my schoolmates and i got a new shirt (yes! a stripey one!) and a pair of white pants for myself. Wanted to wear the brand new pants on the way back to pb... turned out that its a little transparent.. (how come it looked perfect when i tried it on??) and would be too revealing for the pb community (and also for dan's eyes who'd sent me to the stn that day).. So i guess i might have to hold on to that pair of pants til i get a few sets of thongs to wear it with... ;)

Monday
1st day puasa at home... had a sudden fever.. must be the all-day walk i had the day before.. nevertheless... it was worth it!

Tuesday
Balik pb. :( I wish i could spend more time with my dearest hubby-to-be.

Wednesday
Back in school... spent half the day checking emails and browsing thru some blogs... aye... discovered a blog frm satria's link which belongs to aizuddin whose gf is baizura who was one of my schoolmates back in bb! what a small, small world...! And reading aiz's blog just reminds me of my beloved. Honey dearest.. i miss you so much already!!! Boo-hoo-hoo.... !! i hate this after feelings you know. :p

P/S: smalam kantoi ngan diyana kat duta.. aiyak!!!

Hmm... kenapa kalau kita puasa kita rasa lapar?? hehehe... apa la punya question. :p Iskk... this person by the name of ROSDY kept sending me virus infected emails la. I dont even know who this person is nor how he got my add... but for God's sakes... stop sending me infected mails.. please!

I'm going home... i'm going home... :D Yeayyy!! At last! The time i've always waited for had come. Today i'm going back and tmrw, i'm gonna spend the whole day with Dan. Yippeee!!! Very excited. How i wish that transmile didnt screw up with his leaves. Now he has only like 4 days leave je. Now he's in miri... coming home tonight as well... and tomorow is his final leave day. :p So i only have tomorrow to spend with him. 22nd he'll be off to Manila.. for a few days... Uwaaa!!! Camne la bila dah kawin nanti.... Hmm... i know.. i'll request for a supplementary credit card so that he wont feel so bad having to leave me all the time... heheh.. how abt that?? Hehh... naahh.. takde la... i'm just kidding. (Seriously honey.. i dont need it!and i dont want it.) Hmmm... kawin... kawin... tak habis cerita kawin... End of this year, gotta attend quite a few weddings... Lia, Corn, Nura.. hmmm... everybody is getting married. Me? Bile ek? Dunnola.... sometimes i wish that people will stop asking me that question... but then again.. kekadang tu best jugak bila org tanya camtu. Well.. all i can say is.. let time tell... ok?

It had just come to my knowledge that some people that i have no intention of letting them know about the existance of my blog actually knew about it. Oh boy.... but then again.. that's the risk of having an online journal la kan. You're safe as long as you remain anonymous.. but you're no longer anonymous if your friends knows about it.. and people knows that you own a blogspot even if they dont know your specific url (Huh?). Hmm.. all the person has got to do is to search using some search engine and voila!Oh darn... its not like its such a big deal... but.. entah la... i dunno how to explain it. If its someone you dont know personally who just happens to pop in.. thats different. This is someone i know... had a history of... Now that makes a big, hufe difference. How? its something too intricate to explain.

Hmm.. tak kesahla... all i know now is that i'm going home tonite and i'm gonna see my hunny bunny. The rest of the world can go crazy if they want to. I wont mind. Yeah.. and another thing.. we're gonna have a paaaarrrtttyyyyy tonite at 15 tmn pekaka. heheh... an all gal's party. Yeah babyy...! Yeah! So.. this afternoon, gonna go off after meeting Dr Os to get a cake and prepare for the paarrttyyy... yeayyy!!!

Okay. gotta complete my abstract now. So.. everybody.. behave yourselves. i'll be back next monday.. or tuesday.. heheh... BYeeee!!!

P/S: Happy birthday to AZENOOOOO... happy birthday to youuuuuu!!! *Hugz* Mmmmwwwaahhhh!

Completed the flowchart for my application yesterday... question now is ... what language am i going to use? C++ or Java MIDP? I dunno.. i cant think of anything right now. My brain refuse to function as it's now clouded with guilt and frustration and hurt and god-knows-what....

Why is it that we tend to hurt the very person we love?

Okie dokie.. back in campus after 4 days in KL... A lot had happened in that duration.. believe me.. A LOT had happened.

Thurs, Oct 9th
Attended the 1st day of the Ericsson's Developer Days in Ericsson@Cyberjaya. Left home as early as 0630 to find the place and beat the jam. Turned out that the place wasnt that far off.. so i reached there at abt 0730. Drove around for a while and stopped by at the Cyberjaya Lake Garden, reading (more like pretending to read actually) some of the articles on MPS and Symbian that i'd brought wit me. 0825, i drove off to the place, reached there around 0835, registered and waited for the programme to start while having coffee... alone.. :p
0900 - Welcoming address by Mr Hats Olsson; president & country manager, Ericsson (M).
0910 - Benefits of Parlay/OSA by Mr Marc Leclerc; Service Layer Businees Advocate. Very entertaining.
1010 - Keynote address by Dato' V, Danabalan; Sr. Vice President, Client Services, MDC.
1025 - Coffee break. Yummy... had some kuehs and sandwiches. Got to know some developers... collected some business cards. *winks*
1045 - Charging Overview by Mr. Peter Engblom; Sr. Business Support Manager.. pretty boring coz the tone of his voice was somewhat monotonous.
1115 - MMS Overview by Mr Eugene Ng
1145 - Introduction to LBS by Mr Eugene Ng.. a very brief intro of LBS.. not much technical.
1210 - Lunch Break : Had white rice with mixed veggie and sweet n sour fish. Thanks to the caterers.. sedappp!!! Lupa lak nama caterer tu.. :p
1330 - Ericsson MMS SDK for MM7 by Mr Stefan Hellkvist ... pretty cute.. and young.. Heheh.. is one of the many connections that makes up the entire MMS service.
1430 - MPS Intro by Ms Johanna Kraft ... she brought up that the group Abba had songs that actually had connection with the current mobile technology. One was the "Money, Money, Money.." and the other.. i cant remember... Not that i'm an Abba fan anyway. Her intro was more on the SDK backgrounds and such, not much on the technical part.
1450 - Coffee break. Didnt have anything coz i was still full from lunch. Returned the survey forms and got a goodie bag frm EMW, consisting of a document bag of some sort and an Ericsson's neck tag.
1510 - MPS Usage by Mr. Patrick Bertilsson... very handsome guy.. and i mean VERY handsome... a swedish... ish.. hensem seh.. iskkk... dah la bermain mata.. nasib baik la i'm taken.. kalau tak.. i would have flirted gila2..hehe.. since he wasnt wearing any ring on any of his fingers... Talked more on the technical part of MPS.. so that really caught my attention, other than his captivating looks.. ;)
1630 - Programme ends... but i went to see Patrick and Johanna personally asking them abt the integration between MPS and Symbian and abt the error messages that i'd been getting trying to run the example programme... He was cute even when he was explaining things to me... Hehhe... seriously handsome. Dahla pakai tux and such... aiyoo.. cair. :p Heheh.. but then again.. i'm sure that my dear Dan would look even more appealing if he wears tux too.. Seriously honey.. this is not lip service. *Winks*
1700 - balik, salah jalan... so ended up going thru the LDP instead of the Sg Besi Hiway.
1830 - Sampai umah.. sempat tgk athirah kejap je sbb dia nak blk kg. Lepak2 until malam.
2130 - My cuzs, Zura, Awin n Ifah picked me up before picking up another cuz, Syaril to go for a drink at NZ. Lepak2 til 2300 or so.. then balik n tdoq.

Fri, Oct 10th
0645 - kuar umah to go for the 2nd day of the Dev Day thingy
0800 - reached cyberjaya. Lepak by the roadside sementara tunggu 0830 for registration.
0835 - registered and had coffee while waiting for the programme to start. Had a chat with a developer. Cant quite recall his name.
0900 - Opening by Mr Ezani ( the person who'd let me come at the last minute. ;) Hehhe.. thanks sooo much!!)
0915 - Developing Symbian and Java Apps by Mr. Tong Kai Loong. Not much of a technical stuff.
1000 - Coffee break. Had salami sandwich. Sat with a guy named Allan, a developer and he gave me his views on MPS and Symbian and Java.
1020 - Success Story of Akademi Fantasia by Mr Irmi adn Ms Rozina Aziz. They received like 5 million smses of votes (5 mill is the official number.. the actual number is way beyond that i should think.) Another shocking fact : they received like 1000 sms from a single mobile number in the duration of a week. Talk about being fanatic.
1050 - Java and C++ RAD with Borland by Mr Malcolm Groves... very entertaining by such a bubbly programmer.
1200 - Programme ends, and i hurried down to go home as i'd planned to go out wit my mom tat afternoon.
1210 - Took off from Ericsson, put on my sunnies (the one Dan's mom gave me), drove at 80 kmph or so, adjusted my rear view mirror since i wasnt quite comfotable wit it.
1220 - still in cyberjaya. All of a sudden, the left half of the car was already on the pavement. Kinda panicked and my feet was somewhat planted on the gas pedal instead of the brake. Then it strucked me to actually hit the brake, and i tried to steer the car back onto the road. Somehow the kar skidded and spinned. I didnt know what would happen, kept applying the brakes but the car just wouldnt stop and kept spinning. Suddenly i crashed into the decorative plants planted as part of the landscape in cyberjaya.. the one in the middle pavement between the two-way roads. And the car stopped. The srereo was playing "Shake Your Tailfeather". I took a deep breath, switched off everything, took my phone and got off from the car. I looked for dents/ damages on the car. An old merce stopped by and a chinese pakcik came by and asked if i was allright. Two other cars stopped by and came a malay pakcik and an indian guy. The chinese pakcik was telling them how my car spun and stuffs.. and, partly in a daze, i asked "My car really spin aaa??" Later the indian guy got into my car, the malay pakcik pushed the car and the chinese pakcik stopped the traffic at the other side. So the three of them got the car off the pavement onto the other side.. so i had to make a U-Turn to go back to KL. They said that the car is ok and asked if i'm capable of driving home. I said i'm fine. I thanked them profusely and the chinese pakcik asked me to go to the doctor and the indian guy wished me luck. My knees were shaking as i got into the car.. and i took a deep breath.. and headed home... Now driving at a constant speed of 70kmph... with both hands on the wheel... Boy... my first and worst accident. :p

The things i'd learned from the accident:
1. Slow down.. or better, stop the car while handling/adjusting anything while driving.
2. Dont panic. Slam down the brake NOT the gas.
3. Malaysians arent as selfish as they usually potray themselves as. Malaysians can be very helpful, regardless the different races. That's what i call unity in diversity.

Dahla.. penat type... the rest of the weekend.. nothing much.. balik kg.. looked at the new house.. pretty pissed coz its like the size of an apartment.. :p Then got back here on sunday. had a haircut.. yeah.. the pro haircut and highlighted my hair... How was it..?Heheh.. i'll say that my hair looked awesome! ;) So is alqas' hair... heheh.. we got it good gurl!!

oklaa.. planning my hols with dan now. Chiao!

A delightuful sunny morning to start the day with. Went straight to parit buntar bus station after bfast to get my bus ticket.. lohhh.. banjir sehhh... Boleh tahan teruk gak laa.. well.. not that deep.. vehicles can still go through the roads.. but then.. banjir la... Its not a common sight. I asked the man at the counter how long had it been.. he said.. it'd been flooding like that for like four or five days now.. but today is the worst by far. So... nasihat to everyone who's planning to go there today... better go there some other day.. especially you people with lowered cars, seperti keta ABV yang dah memang lowered secara azalinya dan biasanya diloweredkan lagik dengan jumlah orang yang menaikinya... heheh.. jgn marah...! ;)

Saw something about Malaysia on Discovery's Travel and Adventure last night. So this traveller, a female foreigner, went to some states in the peninsular... KL, Kelantan and Terengganu. When she was in Kelantan, she was accompanied by this Malaysian woman by the name of Aliyah.. Ya Allah.. punye la bijak bistarinya pompuan ni. Boleh.. she described Kelantan as being not very much developed compared to the other countries because it is governed by an islamic party that doesnt encourage development. Like.. HELLOOOOO!! Wait.. wait.. dont give me that look yet.. that's not what i mean.. Yes.. it is a fact that the other party didnt do a very good job in developing the country.. but for goodness sakes.. she shouldnt have said it like that.. the stress on the "islamic party". Now people would think that islam is a religion that doesnt promote its believers to become modernized; when in truth, Islam wants us to work all out to gain benefits form both dunia and akhirat and the religion itself never condemn development. Its just the people who rules the country.. who proclaims themselves as pure muslims.. hmm.. itu terserah pada masing-masing la.. If they think they're so pious and know everything about the religion... ikut aa... I'm just stressing out on the gal's words.. ape aaa punya ngok ngek. Then, when the traveller questioned her abt what the people in kelantan do for a living, she said they are "petani".. farmers... Apelaa... obviously.. she doesnt make a good PR for her own country. Cakapla.. they are one of the most entrepeneur-minded population in the country... they do their own business ranging from agricultural products to jewelleries... Appaaaraaa punya mangkuk. Dont la say things that'll make people think of Malaysia as a 3rd world nation. We're way beyond that already. We are now a developing country for god's sakes... she should be proud of that... Maybe what she said about the country werent all wrong but at least be on the fair side for the sake of the whole nation la... This is an international production. We'd wanna give a good impression kan... at least say something nice la... itu pun tak tau ke.. maybe she was too nervous being in front of the camera and all... Well.. if she was.. then she'd might as well do what i would do.. refuse to be on the show in the first place. Takdela orang ingat malaysia ni kuno sangat.. and takdela aku kena mengutuk dia dalam blog ni... nyusahkan orang jek. :p Hahhaaa...

Okie dokie.. mu bus will be at 1530 today.. so i'd better read up on some symbian and stuffs to get myself prepared for the thingy tomorrow.. I'll be alone.. all by myself on both t he days.. alamaaakkk.. iskk.. tadek member nak makan sesama.. kene kontrol aa cenggini.. isk.. demm... Okiess.. may everybody have a splendid weekend. To alqas and satria: cya guys on sunday... haircut!haircut!.. not just any haircut.. a professional haircut.. dont play play aaa... hehehe.. berlagak sehhh.. :p

~ A L H A M D U L I L L A H ! ! ~

Aaahhh... thank God Almighty... Thank you for making things simpler for me.... :D I ran into an announcement yesterday on EMW news board and there was this thing abt a Developer Day that'll be held in S'ngor on Thursday. i rushed to get to the registration page... and found out out that the registration is already closed (what do i expect?? 3 days to the seminar.. duh!!!) I was quite frustrated... but still, thank God, i have my dean to refer to.. so he called up someone... went thru some 'cable-ing' business.. and today, i've already got an email confirming my seat to the seminar. :) So, i'm gonna pack my bags and get back to kl tomorrow afternoon coz the seminar will be on thursday and friday. It'll be in Cyberjaya... so i'm gonna hafta drive there... but i dont know where that is! Perhaps i'll ask my bro to take me to a Cyberjaya tour right after he fetches me from Duta tmrw... tu pun kalau dia nak la.. If not, i'd hafta rely on the map provided la... Hmm... and you know how bad my sense of direction is... that's why i need a pilot! heheh.. ;)

Last 4 days had been thoroughly wet. It started to rain on Thursday.. and it hadnt stopped ever since! Well... today, it looked more sunny than the last 4 days.. but it still drizzles sometimes... so i dont know when exactly its gonna really stop. Hmm.. alqas: Agaknya that "God" departs from penang kot.. tu yang northern region jek yang ujan lebat... the rest of peninsular ok jek... Next yr request dia depart frm singapore pulak la...

Despite the pouring rain, Nura's wedding preps were still on... Friday, we went to Penang, amek aunty Quraishah and went to the jewellery store to get Nura her wedding prezzies from her mom. Saturday, we went to padang besaq... luckily it wasnt raining there... There were a lot of stuffs there but i wasnt really in a shopping mood.. so everything i saw didnt seem appealing enough.. but i did get a few stuffs though. I bought a brooch each for my mom and Dan's mom.. some wooden handphone stand for Dan (i thought it looked kinda cute at that shop.. now i think its crappy.. should i still give it to him?..Hmm.. bagik je la kan... dah niat nak bagik.. :p ) and nothing for Dan's dad... no idea what to get him.. hope he wouldnt mind.. :p We got back from there at about 1700 but we only reached Sg. Dua at around 2030.. why???? Well... it rained heavily... some areas of the highway was flooded.. and there was a massive traffic... so.. you can figure out what happened right? Anyway... upon reaching Sg. Dua, uncle (Nura's dad) treated us mee udang at this particular stall that had been visited by the "Jalan2 Cari Makan" crew.... Verdict: The mee udang was a far cry from being sedap! :p Indah khabar dari rupa... i think the only specialty was that it was served with large prawns (we were charged like rm27 for 5 prawns)... the taste... well... its not worth the travel... baik makan kat lembab ke.. sungai ke... pejabat tanah ke... Takyah masuk Jln2 Carik Makan pun... :p But then.. the satay was ok la... for 40 sen secucuk.. it was ok... just wished that they gave extra gravy...

Sunday, we were on our own. Nura's parents, bro and sis in law had to rush to melaka... kak Su's dad passed away (May peace be upon his soul -Al fatihah-). So we had roti canai and roti arab for breakfast, then went off to mak ngah piah's house before proceeding to penang to send aunty Quraishah home. After that, went to greenlane's mcD, hoping so much to get some milk shakes....and.... takde!! i wonder what happened to all the shake machines!!! Havent had my favourite strawberry milkshake for ages!!! Dah takde... nak buat cane.. so we ordered burgers for dinner... and drove home... At megamall, singgah jap kat Cup-Bon and bought fruit juice with those chewy pearl thingy... I had sour plum.. hehe.. teringat masa 1st time nak jumpa Dan's parents at the hospital... that was the drink i had before meeting them... when i was in the car, jumping up and down trying to cool myself down.. heheh.. that and the cheese and lemon crepe.

Monday.. balik sini balik... and found out about the Developer Day thingy....

Okie... thats it.. better get off studying things to prepare for the seminar thingy. Dont want to be so clueless abt everything when i get there. So.. take care everyone.. will be back monday. Chiao!!

P/S: ala... tak dapat pegi kelas tmn Brown la kamis ni.. huhuhu... ;(( Takpe... you lose some.. you gain some...

Adei... banyaknya makan. Had a huge lunch at kak Nadras' house today. She had asked Nura for a lift home and invited us in for lunch. We had generous helpings of white rice, beef rendang, fried long beans, chicken and veggie tom yum and anchovies sambal. Gila banyak makan nasik. Nearly double my daily rice intake... really! But that's not all! Me and nura were still craving for something else on the way back to our place, so we stopped by at Kedai Hamdan to get an ice cream each. Umm... yummy. Where had all the diet plans went to? Dont ask. I wish i had an answer to that.

Its not easy to get back into a diet regiment when you've put it on hold for a while. I'd been so drifted away from a sensible diet plan for quite some time now that the idea of not consuming rice (yep.. that staple food of ours) in a day makes me feel kinda dizzy and jumpy and wanting to puke... heheh... nah.. I'm just exaggerating. But still... it's gonna take some time for my tummy to adapt to smaller portioned meals. That doesnt mean that it's impossible though. I should think that my tummy would get used to that idea soon enough. Anyway.. i think i'd had comments from some people motivational enough to kickstart a new, personalized diet plan for myself. I wont be too harsh on myself though. I wont force myself to excercise excessively or put too many restrictions on what i should or shouldnt eat. That wont work. Furthermore, things in excess can be quite dangerous. I'll be a moderate dieter.... might not achieve significant results in a short time... but at least i'll keep my health in check and i wont get trapped in the yoyo diet syndrome and pile on twice my actual weight when i stop dieting. Yikes!

Dan and i had a really long chat on the phone last night. He was at his parents and he passed the call to his mom for a while so that i can speak to her. The first thing she said after i said hello was, "Seronoknya suara you dapat cakap dengan Dan". and i replied quite so nonchalantly' "mestila aunty, dah lama tak cakap dengan dia." hehhe.. Selambe seh... dunno where that came from. Must be overly excited getting to hear his voice after such a long time!!

Charmaine called alqas just now... Our licenses are ready for collection. Yeay!! This means that we are now Licensed Open Water Diver. *winks* :D Next dive site: Phuket. When? God knows... soon i hope... soon after raya.

Okie dokie.. still got to figure out why the tomcat server conveys a HTTP 500 error message. Better get on wit dat. :p

Life - full of ups and downs. Without challenge, life would be too bland to be appreciated. Just got back from the dean's office. He had to delay our appointment to later this afternoon coz something came up and he had to attend to that. I desperately need to resolve some issues regarding my project with him. My project is a good one... but its quite difficult to get on with it when there's no one that's well versed in this field that i can refer to. Well.. there are.. but i can only get to them online.... and they are professionals whom i can only get in touch through my questions in mobile application forums, such of sun's java or sony ericsson's or nokia's. So now, i wanna try to get him to narrow down my scope a little... and after that, i'm getting a 2nd supervisor who is not as busy as the dean. I dont want to have to scrape off this project entirely because this is something new and there is a large market for mobile applications. But then again, i dont think that i'm the "lab-rat" material... you know.. the one who gets to be the 1st to try out something new.... the pioneer.... i dont think i'm capable of being that... and yet.. i'd wanna do it. *Sulk* I dunno... for the time being, i just wanna work on something that i can have someone well-versed to refer to, and something that i can complete in a few month's time. I'm getting sick of being here for too long. :p

Dan called me last night. He's back in KL but he arrived later than scheduled coz there were some problems and the flight had to be delayed. It was around 0130 when he called and i was already asleep, but i struggled to keep myself awake coz i'd been waiting to hear from him for quite some time. I miss him so much! The last time i saw him was on Sept 19th.. oh.. it'd only been two weeks? Geez... it sure seemed like ages!...

Anyway, he was telling me about his worries.... his ATPL test, his 2-weeks leave.... in short, he was stressed out. He told me that he had to be in Shenzen for another fortnight before he can get his 2-weeks leave. That means he'll only be back on the 25th or so... when according to what was planned, his leave was to start around the 13th or so and we're supposed to have a week-off together starting the 17th onwards. So, when he told me that he's only coming back on the 25th, i was really crushed... frustrated... annoyed... everything. Well, its not his fault that he'll have to fly... its the company la... Stupid transmile. I mean.. when you've already granted leave to a person on a certain date... means that you have to let that person have his leave on that very date. They're not supposed to push back his leave just because they cant find other people to fly. Its not that he'd just applied for the f***ing leave yesterday.. he did so like last month... early last month.. and they've granted that. They should have scheduled for other pilots to take up his place already right?? But no.... they want him to fly coz there's no one else to fly... Bloody idiots! I'm not being selfish here. Its just that.. the company had screwed up with his leaves one too many times. It doesnt just affects me.... but it affects his plans with his family as well. But what can i do about it? I cant even tell him that i'm really sad that we couldnt spend the week together.... I dont want to add on to his worries. Well... thanks to the motherf***ing bastards, i might only see him during raya... IF we're lucky enough.

Last week, i had a so-called friend making a very judgemental remark on another dear friend of mine whom that so-called friend barely knew. For God's sakes.... who does she think she is? If she's so perfect... she'd be God!.. but hell.. she's not God.. she has flaws... and with all that flaws... what makes her think that she qualifies to pass such judgemental comments - to someone she barely knew! Just because she's in a whole different league than i am now doesnt make her any better. We are all human. We can never be perfect creatures. What's good for one person doesnt mean that it'll be good for the rest of the population. I feel that friends should be sensitive to their friend's feelings before passing any comments, especially when commenting on someone so dear to that person. If she has nothing nice to say... then.. dont say anything. Its not wrong to give out advice... but advice is totally different from being judgemental.... and advice is only to be given when it is asked! Right now, i seriously dont feel eager to know about that so-called friend's life anymore. If before this i'd been really keen to know about her whole new life.. well... thats just not the case anymore. If she thinks that she has such a perfect life right now.. surely my closing out from her world wont even scratch a mark. Good! Then we're both happy. Why cant i just be forgiving? Well... forgiveness, like advice; is granted when it is asked (to me.. thats what i think. Everyone else can think of it differently, we all have the right to). I'm not someone holy... i'm just plain jane.. i take time to forgive.... and much, much longer to forget.

There... i'm pretty relieved now.